The Best Question I’ve Been Asked in a Long Time

I am irritated with certain colleagues today. So I sat down in my badass badassiest Eastern European colleague’s office.

“I am incredibly irritated by everyone in the offices to your left,” I said.

“Would you like me to beat them up?” she asked.

“Yes,” I said. “Yes, I would. First This Annoying One and then That Annoying One.”

“Do you think This Annoying One bruises like a peach?” she asked, one eyebrow cocked.

Yes, I told her. Yes, I do. He most definitely bruises like a peach.